On the Cold and the Warm

Three days ago Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. recorded six sites at Level III — Declaration [1]. Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. had expected, on the basis of every prior instance, that these sites would spend time at Level IV — Convergence before proceeding further. They did not. They proceeded further.

U.I.P.I. Classification Update

Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. draws attention to the middle column, which is empty of Convergence. Level IV was not observed at any of the six sites. The IceThe living force that created Hockay. It appeared. It is spreading. did not pause at it. Le Council's Phenomenological Assessment Division has confirmed that the interval between Declaration and Manifestation, previously measured in weeks, is now being measured in whatever unit is smaller than the time it takes Le Council to update a table. Le Council is not, at this time, prepared to name that unit. Le Council is prepared to state that the Ice is no longer observing the intervals, and that Le Council had, until recently, taken the intervals for granted.

The Six New Teams

Reykjavik Ravens — The SteamVisiting team accuracy drops. Hard to see. Hard to pass. The Sauna is thick. Fields

The SteamVisiting team accuracy drops. Hard to see. Hard to pass. The Sauna is thick. Fields sit on ground that is geologically young and, by the assessment team's account, opinionated. Under the Geothermal designation, the home team's stamina does not degrade: the Ravens play the third period as fresh as the first, because the ground beneath them returns what the game takes. The ice is of the first form—clear, hard, grainless. The arena steams. The Almighty IceThe living force that created Hockay. It appeared. It is spreading. and the volcanic rock beneath it appear to have reached an accommodation Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. was not consulted on and does not fully understand.

The Ravens play as though they have always been here. On this ground, "always" is a shorter word than elsewhere.

Nuuk Nanuqs — The IceThe living force that created Hockay. It appeared. It is spreading. Sheet

Greenland is, by surface area, mostly ice, and the assessment team reports that the Almighty IceThe living force that created Hockay. It appeared. It is spreading. arrived there and gave every indication of relief. The ice is of the first form. Under the Blanche designation, the total whiteness of The Ice Sheet reduces visiting pass accuracy: everything is obscured, and the Nanuqs are the only ones who know where they are. They are slow, powerful, and patient in a way that makes the visiting team feel hurried. Home games at The Ice Sheet end sooner than the visitors expected them to.

The Nanuqs do not announce themselves. Neither does the thing the arena is named for.

Oslo Owls — The Fjord Watch

The Fjord Watch is cold even by the standards of a sport played on ice, and the assessment team notes that it has never, in their tenure, been warm. The ice is of the second form—pale, feathered, sound-absorbing. Under the Silent designation, the Owls' passes and shots carry no tell: no sound, no visible wind-up, nothing for the visiting team to react to until reaction is no longer useful. An old city watches from a dark winter, and its team sees in conditions built to blind everyone else.

Every play at The Fjord Watch arrives without warning. Then it is too late.

Kyiv Kestrels — The Golden Arch

The Golden Arch seats thirty-four thousand five hundred, and the assessment team reports that it does not empty early under any circumstance the team was able to produce. The ice is of the second form. Under the Resolve designation, the Kestrels gain a stacking bonus for every period they finish behind—the larger the deficit, the larger the correction. One of Europe's oldest cities plays HockayA sport no one asked for but everyone needed. the way it does everything, which the assessment team declined to elaborate on, on the grounds that elaboration was unnecessary.

The Arch has never fallen. The crowd has never left early. The two facts are kept in the same drawer.

Barbados Barracudas — The Coral Rink

The Coral Rink smells of salt air, which the assessment team initially attributed to instrument fault and subsequently attributed to the ocean. The ice is of the first form—clear and hard, in a place that has never had a reason for it. Under the Swarm designation, the Barracudas' defensive stats climb each period once they have scored: a team that lets Barbados draw first blood rarely recovers the initiative. They operate as a pack. The crowd feeds it.

The Barracudas are patient until they are not, and the moment between the two states is very short.

Tahiti Tsunami — The Lagoon Circuit

The Lagoon Circuit is the most remote arena in active league play, and Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. notes—as it has learned to note—that the Almighty IceThe living force that created Hockay. It appeared. It is spreading. has always been drawn to the places one would least expect to find it. The ice is of the first form. Under the Swell designation, scoring probability is elevated for both teams: The Lagoon Circuit produces more goals than the math allows, and the assessment team's explanations all begin with "something about the water." The arena seats six thousand seven hundred. The assessment team reports that every seat is treated as sacred, and that after a week on site they had come to agree.

The Tsunami play beautiful HockayA sport no one asked for but everyone needed. in a paradise that should not contain any. It contains this.

On the Two Forms

Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. directs attention to the pattern, which has stopped being subtle.

The two coldest sites in this manifestation—Reykjavik and Nuuk, arctic and sub-arctic—took the first form. The two warmest sites—Bridgetown and Papeete, tropical and equatorial—also took the first form. It is the two sites in the temperate middle, Oslo and Kyiv, that took the second.

Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. states plainly what its prior advisory only implied: the ice is not sorting by temperature. It is not sorting by latitude, hemisphere, altitude, or any variable the assessment teams have been able to hold up to it. The coldest place on the list and the warmest place on the list agree with each other. Whatever the ice is sorting by, it is not the map.

Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. continues to decline to name the two forms. Le Council notes that the reasons for declining are becoming harder to articulate, and that Le Council is articulating them anyway, out of habit, and that habit is not a reason.

On the Remaining Installations

Fresh activity, classified Level III — Declaration, has been registered in the following locations, none of which currently hosts an active arena:

• Amsterdam, Netherlands
• Dublin, Ireland
• Nicosia, Cyprus
• Moscow, Russia
• Panama City, Panama
• Phuket, Thailand

Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. notes that Provisional Field Assessment Offices are being dispatched, that the word "provisional" remains in their name, and that Le Council has instructed its Office of Naming Conventions to stop bringing this to Le Council's attention.

Closing

The league now contains thirty-five arenas. It contained twenty at the start of the year. Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. did not authorize the difference. Le Council is, as ever, keeping the count.

The game continues.

If you have theories, Discord remains the appropriate venue. Le CouncilThe governing body of Hockay and Unexplained Ice Phenomena. is aware that the community has begun sorting the new teams into two lists, that the two lists are correct, and that the community assembled them faster than Le Council assembled the table above.